The Unveiled Vigils - Prayer #1

A'udhu billahi min ash-shaytan ar-rajeem, 
Bismillah Ar-Rahman Ar-Rahim

Lord, I am utterly useless

If I put myself first, and expect You to care for me 

to the exclusion of the world

then I am as a deluded heretic

and if I put myself last, and regard myself as the least among Your agenda

then, like so many, I pretend that I can manage on my own

I can neither insist on Your exclusive attention nor trust in my self-reliance

My conundrum in requiring more from myself while needing You more

means I must rely on myself to do worthy deeds and attract Your Love

but myself is unreliable in securing Your Love

it is only through Your Mercy that myself wishes to seek You

Because it is only by You that I get to You.

Lord, You are completely managing the whole affair-

I am just a vessel; a medium of nothing

I am totally dependent on You

This is all Your story, not mine-

So write it as You see fit

You are the best Author, Writer, Speaker

Lord of 'Be and it is!"

Let it be that these moldy, unread pages of my life

contain some eloquent and riveting tale

of adventure and excitement

of joy and laughter

of intrigue and pleasant surprise

of trial and heroic sacrifice

of drama and moving love

of benevolence and great service

of determination and satisfying triumph

of 'God is Greater!' in Your worship

O Lord of "Be and it is!"

Let it be so, for You are Everything to aid me

and I am nothing to aid myself
Help Your servant to write this story well

Ameen ya Rabb al-'alameen